Sorrento
Praiano
Positano.
Ravello
Egypt

So, you wanna take this bus down the coast?  I'd take my car, but you can go if you want.  So, get on the bus.  You, fat guy, stop pushing that lady.  Come on pilgrims we gotta get going or we're not gonna get to Ravello in time for pizza.  Now, don't be stupid, sit on the right hand side.  Unless of course you want to look at a rock wall the whole trip.  (Where do they get these tourists anyway?  Buffalo? Don't they know that the right side looks out over the water and the left side is against the cliff.  Jeeze, Louise.)

Just sit down, will ya.  We've only been on the road for 20 minutes and we are not goin back to Sorrento for more Limoncello and inlaid wood or carvings of Punchinello.  
Can ya all hear me in the back?  I can never figure out which side of this thing to talk into.  Ok?  Great.  I'm gonna stop here and I want you to look out the back window.  Yep, that's Naples and Mount Vesuvius.  The Italians call it Vesuvio, but what do they know?  No, it's not two mountains, it's one.  The top got blown off during an eruption leaving a crater in the middle.

Can any of you guys read this sign?  I can't find my glasses.  Oh, right, we need to turn left.  We missed Positano and Praiano?  Tough break.  Suck it up.

Look up there on your TV's.  This here map shows all the major cities and my buddy Paul's house.  He has been down this coast enough times to be a bus driver.  Only problem is he's too short to see over the dash.  Ignore the red line.  It's a route I took when I had a few too many.

Put your shoes on, we're going to stop here in Praiano for a while.  It's a little town, but they got some good capuchineos to drink and its not too far down if you slip and fall.  Yep, take a look to the South, or is it North?  You think its West.  What do you know?  You gotta compass.  Well, who cares, you paid to look, not jaw.  (I hate smart a.. tourists) 

Yes, there are very few drivers who can park on top of a hotel.  No, it won't do you any good to complain to the company, my brother owns it.  Nice view though, so stop shaking and get out and take a look.

Enjoy the scenery.  We've got a lot more excitement in store.

I'm tired.  We gonna stop here in Positano and I'm takin a nap.  Go for a walk, get a wine, buy some stuff from all these shops, have lunch, enjoy the scenery...I don't know.  Just get out.

All the way to Amalfi and only hit one car and one moped.  Not bad for my second trip this year!  

We leave in 30 minutes.  
You're gonna rent a car for the trip to Ravello?  Hey, you gonna ruin my self confidence!

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